5.29.2010

rainy season. at once wonderful and awful. the promise of life, the revival of all growing things, brings a joy to the hearts of all in the Honduran campo. corn can be planted, zacate grows quicker, and everything begins to swell and grow ripe. but the constant wetness, the grey skies, the lack of sun, heat, and clarity bring a certain sadness into the air. clothes are constantly humid, rain boots become a necessity, and leaving the house grows into a task instead of a joy. it is amazing how a change in weather can inflict a change in lifestyle so quickly. and this is another reason I don't think i could ever spend my entire life in a country like Honduras. 3 months straight of rain would bring about depression every time, and slowly but surely i would probably lose the only marbles i have left. and although it's not much, but i prefer to be somewhat sane to being completely lost in dark brooding thoughts. and sure, one can say, it's all in your head, rain is life, it's a happy time. of course it is, but not when it happens every day, week upon week, with no end in sight, and everything begins to mold and rot, including the mind. i don't know how they do it here, how they maintain their smiles, but they do. that's for damn sure.

5.21.2010

i saw a dead guy today. not like sixth sense, "i see dead people" kind of dead guy, not casper the friendly ghost or anything like that. no, a real dead guy. i was on my way to santa rosa when my jalon slowed down. i took out my headphones, and stood up in the back of the pick-up to see what was going on. up ahead, a police barricade was slowly being erected, and a line of cars was quietly streaming by, with people hanging out of their windows curiously looking ahead. so i joined the masses in their quest for answers, and looked on with no idea of what was to come. as i watched the police officers tape off the area, i noticed up ahead, about 25 meters in front of me a pair of shoes, which i soon realized were connected to feet, legs, a torso, and a head. a person, lying in the road. blood was streaming from his head, and he lay there, uncovered, for the bulging eyes of the onlookers to gawk at. i had never seen a dead person before, and i looked on with a morbid curiosity. the saddest thing, and this is what really scares me, is that it had almost no effect on me. i don't know if it's years of action movies, or killing millions of nazis in video games, but this poor guy had absolutely no impact on me. i expected my stomach to turn, my heart to sink, at least my eyes to close on instinct, but nothing came. and my ride rolled by, the driver and other passengers with the same reaction as me. as we drove further, we found the cause of the accident. a bus was parked along the road with the man's bicycle crushed beneath the front tire. it seems that the dead guy, sorry dead guy but i don't even know your name, it seems he was riding in the middle of the lane in the morning, when the bus, coming from the opposite direction, decided to pass a car while in a curve and going uphill. a bad combination. as the bus reached the hills summit, the byciclist did the same, and the result was, well you already know. the worst part is, no one will probably be arrested or jailed for this. no one will act as a witness, testify, or even care. because, and here's the saddest part, life is worth very little here. people die in accidents, get killed by jealous boyfriends, get chopped up by machetes for absolutely nothing, and people just keep on going. they say, what a shame. but that's it.
oh and here's the kicker. in the time that i have lived here, at least three people have died on the same exact 50 foot stretch of highway. but no one even thinks to put up a no passing sign, paint some lines on the road, maybe fix the road, or really do anything about it to prevent it from happening again. the last guy was on a motorcycle and was left so unidentifiable, that they had to use the motorcycle's registration to figure out who it was. and for the same reason too. someone tried to pass without any visibility, and ended up taking the life of somebody's son, or husband, or father. to be honest, it scares the shit out of me, but the worst part is, that there is nothing to be done about it. you just gotta keep on moving, taking the same road because there are no others, and hope that you wont be in a car as a passenger when some asshole does the same thing. i add this not so that my parents worry, or my friends, or peace corps staff, but its just a reality all around honduras. there are no traffic laws that are really enforced, no signs, no lines on the highway. it's like russian roulette, with cars instead of bullets, and sometimes more than one person with the barrel pointed at their head.

there's more that i was going to write, things about life, work, the horse, and whatnot, but after having written what I just did, I need to clear my head and take some time to think. maybe seeing the dead guy did have some sort of impact on me that just stayed dormant until now. everything otherwise is good tho, and soon, just within a few weeks, i will be on american soil for 2 weeks, so get ready.

5.05.2010

it's wed, and i spent the morning on horseback. at this point, all of my projects are moving along, although somewhat slowly, and i feel as though i am finally accomplishing something. and even if i accomplish only 1 thing, one tiny thing, then 2 years of peace corps will be worth it. right now, i am running out of fingers for all my small accomplishments, starting the count on my toes. and the amazing thing is, all the volunteers around me are equally, if not more, successful. left and right, community businesses, organizations, schools, medical centers, churches, women's groups, and the communities themselves are growing, improving, and learning with us. the exchange is incredible, and what's interesting is that every little action, every interchange, counts. it's not much, but it definitely gets the job done.
as for me, let's go step by step. turbine project is one. probably the most important one, not because of its benefit to people, but because of its benefit to me. yeah that's right, totally selfish. but it's a dream. it's moving along at exactly the pace i expected. due to the conflicting schedules of people, lack of accessibility to the area, and immensity of the project, we are still in the initial steps, but there's constant progress. an local engineer, representative of a german development organization, is coming on saturday to inspect the water source, take professional measurements, and tell me whether or not the project is possible. and i know his answer already, but i would like to hear it from him. then we go to another organization, this time local, who will act as a third party in our collaboration with los alemanes. basically, it looks like we have the right group together, now let's see if we can bring electricity to 25 families in the middle of the mountains. that means 500 trees saved a year due to electric stoves (they burn to cook now, they wont have to after), another 10-20 due to lightbulbs, and countless hours of extra time. i think after that, i can sleep easy at night forever.
solar panels are another. that's right, im into that shit too. at this moment, 35 families in the same mountain as the aforementioned community will be getting a whole solar panel system, with battery, converter, wiring, energy saving lightbulbs, car lighter chargers, dc/dc units, the whole shebang. that means lights, tvs, radios. some trees saved, some time saved, some novellas watched. pretty sweet. but i didn't have to do much for that so far. although i organized the original meeting and facilitated the reunion, the real effort falls on a local NGO. but i'll be with them every step of the way. planning, installing, training. right now, i have already attended a workshop on basic electric systems and solar panel installation, and next week, part 2. complex system design and installation. should be dope. plus free hotel and food for three days/nights. so yeah, that's project 2.
worms. still chillin with the wrigglers. but it's slow, slower than i expected, and now i think all we can do is wait. we need the population to double about 4-5 times, which can last well over 6 months. which is actually good timing, because that means that by next coffee season, we will have enough worms to process all the pulp quickly and efficiently. so although it wasn't ready in time for this year, it should be good by the next temporada. and our worms are big bastards. thick, long...yeah anyway. the point is, i've seen other set-ups, and they all have tiny little skinny buggers. so yeah, my worm is bigger than yours.
gardens, still waiting.
eco-tourism, starting.
housing improvements, something that just popped out of the blue, and hey, may turn out to be awesome. who wouldn't feel good about rebulding the houses of 10 families with habitat-honduras, a local NGO that does just that...build houses.
and now i get to my personal project, the horse. ruso. i've been thinkin about this a while, and i almost considered selling him due to the costs and time investment that i sometimes can't provide. and then today happened. this takes us back to the beggining.
it's wed and i spent the morning on horseback. i rode around for a while talking to carpinters, getting ideas on cabin construction for the eco-tourism project, and then i decided: time to have a little fun. so i took ruso on a ride to the nearby town of yaonera. i think thats how you spell it. anyway. we're riding along, sometimes gallop, sometimes slow. it's hard to run downhill, and sometimes you just don't feel like holding on to your hat. anyway, i reach the entrance to the town and decide to turn around. i figured, i covered the distance necessary so, why not go back. as i start the return, i hear a sound behind me as a guy on a horse, and another on a mule, round the corner at full gallop. now, turns out mules can run. not super fast, but definitely faster than i ever imagined. so i think, hmmm...as they pass me i squeeze ruso with my boots, and he springs into full speed. and a horse is not like a car or motorcycle. when you squeeze, they go. no rev, no acceleration, the muscles just tense up, and like a slingshot, all of a sudden you are propelled forward. i catch them as the slope drops, and all of us slow down to prevent an accident. horses aren't made to run downhill, it's a balance thing. they can do it, but it's dangerous, and at any moment they can lose balance and slip or flip or fall. basically it sucks. so we slow down, exchange smiles and knowing glances like two guys in hot rods at a stop-light. as the slope levels out we all bend forward, and go into a gallop again. the mule falls back but the other horse keeps up for some time. and as i lean into ruso, we start pulling away at a speed altogether new for me, and the last thing i hear from the guy behind me: "god please dont let there be a car around the corner". and luckily there wasn't. we both turn left and slow down again due to the incline.
"that's a beautiful horse you got there man" says my new friend.
"thank you sir, igual"
"sure can run"
"your's too"
"not like that"
we start chatting and ride on for a few seconds when the guy on the mule catches up to us.
"damn dude, what a potro (stallion)"
we exchange stories of our animals. turns out they train horses and mules, and the mule they have with them was given to them by someone to work on. sweet mule. never thought i'd say that. we decide to race one last time, a flat stretch, a curve, and a hill to climb at the end. i fly forward and reach the hill top in less than 30 seconds. i turn around, and my mouth drops to the ground. the other horse is close, and chasing the horse is the mule, with the saddle dragging behind, and the rider coming in last. turns out mule guy didn't tighten his saddle, and when the mule rounded the corner the saddle slipped, and he fell. jumped. a little of both. it's amazing he survived. sloppy, not to tighten your saddle prior to riding. i got down, helped him with his cinchas, and all three of us rode off together. it was incredible. they told me i should race him. i think i will. can't sell him anymore can i?