2.20.2010
hn38.
i think the hardest thing so far about the whole peace corps experience is that little credit is ever given to the volunteers. anyone who's called licenciado here in honduras, or someone who has graduated from university, is talked to with a huge amount of respect. these people are employed as tecnico's, people who come and advise others, almost like consultants. but when we come in, as voluntarios, even though we might all have advanced degrees (in some cases even a master's), people talk to us in a whole different way. its as if with the title "volunteer" we are clueless, with absolutely nothing to offer. but then, why would we be sent here in the first place? what purpose do we serve? and i know, many of you are probably thinking, dima maybe you're looking at this all wrong. maybe its because of your compulsion to always be right and show off your smartness, that's making you act this way. and yes, that very well may be possible. and if so, forgive me, but i think this goes deeper. i think, because i look young, and am not from here, i am considered just some gringo who's trying to get things done but has no real capacity to do so. and you know what, that's just not fair. just because i don't know all the things honduran farmers grow up with, doesn't mean i'm incapable of everything. it definitely doesn't mean that i grew up in a box, with everything handed to me. i have so many fellow volunteer friends that want to print business cards that say licenciado just so that their opinions begin to matter. and what's worse, when our suggestions are logical, scientifically based, and constructive, they are frequently thrown out based on what some other licenciado said a while back, not taking into account that we are equally qualified to make such statements. and whats even worse, those that come to communities as tecnicos often promote technology or projects produced by their companies just to make a sale, instead of thinking about the community, and so their opinions are naturally biased. the thing is, i know i act like a know-it-all, and i need to work on that, but come on, give me some room to function. why ask for my help to organize a project and then tell me what i should do point by point. if you know how to do it, do it. don't tell me how to do my job. and if i need help, i'll ask. and i will always respect your opinion. but its hard to respect someone's ideas when yours dont get the same. thats all i got for now.
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could it be because you don't have any training in what you are doing? nat resource management major at Rutgers does not really give you the background to do advanced stuff in your current field.... a bit of humility, once again, would go a long way.
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ReplyDeleteok, I wrote a long response that I deleted, and I will condense it here. This is not a humility thing. This is a problem that almost all volunteers face in this country that I have talked to. And yes, it's true, I have little practical experience, but what I'm talking about goes deeper. My point is that there is a disparity between how people view local college grads and us. Hondurans that have finished college are seen as these, idols, people to be viewed with the utmost respect. And we, because of our title of volunteer, are seen as, well less. And that's what bothers me. Because although my college education may not have given me much, it definitely improved my capacity to learn, and with the loads of written resources I have here, I can learn the conceptual side of almost anything I need. Now that already puts me a step ahead of anyone who has no experience what so ever. And yet, when I may get into a technical discussion with someone, and bring up what I had learned while reading, they brush it off as something that means nothing. what good is a book, they say. it means nothing they say. and what's funny is, if a licenciado who had no practical experience, fresh out of a honduran university, came here and said the same thing based on what they read in a book, they would get a standing ovation. so, that's my point
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what Dimka is talking about - he is not viewed as a professional because he chose to live a volunteer life which by their assumption one can only chose if he/she is not qualified to hold a real job. That's it i think, so it will be much harder for a volunteer to get respect because of this very status. Just think of the reaction of some of Dima's relatives when they learned that Dima wanted to go to Peace Corps... Americans do have a different mentality about helping people and this is what gets them into trouble. So i suggest patience and wisdom here, love, mom
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